Crossroads: Entering a new phase as a mother-artist

A rebirth of sorts...

Hi there,

How are you today?

Btw… You’re truly invited to respond to that question in the comments below ❤️

Contrary to the January blues, I’ve experienced an unexpected surge in creative energy since the new year… Almost like a rebirth of sorts!

After much contemplation on why this is, I realised that my youngest daughter is about to turn two.

For the past five years, every single cell of my body has been consumed by motherhood. Whatever was left (honestly, not much) would be externalised through my art and work.

I’ve made no secret that starting this publication

Follow Your Gut

, was me listening inwards and hearing a big ROAR screaming for a place to rekindle my creative power again post motherhood.

Why is it, despite mothers always having been around, that we’re all so SHOCKED when motherhood sucks the life out of us?

I truly love to be a mother and I have my two littles with me at home fulltime (no external childcare). But I’m finally realising that a part of me died in order for me to rebuild her again.

I was prepared to have my world shook, but I wasn’t prepared for HOW LONG this bloody rebuild would take!

There were moments where I could glimpse her, my internal light, only to see her fade away again.

I have to admit that the circumstances probably didn’t speed things up. After having been stranded in a new country 5 months pregnant, birthing my second daughter on the floor in our temporary apartment in said new country (Slovenia), moving another 2 times across countries… I’m now ready!

AND IT FEELS BLOODY AMAZING, so I had to write about it!

What has the creative surge resulted in?

Other than religiously prioritising daily solo-walks (whether for 10 minutes or an hour is less important), I feel a deeper joy for getting to work through my eco-system, offerings and projects again.

Up until now (so, for about 3:ish years), I’ve felt like I was drowning under all the “I have to get this sorted” stuff. I’ve pushed it to the sidelines in favour of new projects that could keep me going without killing everything.

My work and business kept going. I managed to keep rolling, because deep in my gut I knew that this day would finally make its appearance: I AM READY!

Screaming to the universe so that it will help me hold myself accountable.

• I am ready to re-structure my ecosystem according to the plan that I’ve dreamed up for the past year.

• I’m ready to re-write all the pages that I have let linger for too long.

• I’m ready to try new things to grow my art and business again, something that I’ve been hesitant with for the longest time.

• I’m ready to think BIG again

“Don’t take on more then you can manage”, was a constant whisper in my ear.

Well, I’M READY NOW!

Does it mean that I’m entering a yes-phase?

Hell no, haha!

I’ve been an independent artist for long enough to know that the yes-to-everything-phase is not coming back. Instead, I’ll be doubling down on the projects that have been brewing inside of me for several years. The projects that keep me up at night, dreaming of how life will look like when they come to fruition.

I’m 100% certain that what has kept my business afloat is that it’s all in-house.

There are no middle men managing my input and output, which means I can decide exactly how, when and where I put my energy.

It also means that I don’t have external pressure of having to reach certain metrics. My business is internally-driven.

When you’re the independent owner of your work, you need significantly less sales to make a decent living, because you don’t owe anything to anyone else. It’s the most LIBERATING feeling ever.

This is why I have zero intentions of pitching my new book “Embroidery Wanderlust; Tales and Stitches Through Europe” to any publisher. It’ll be an exclusive experience only accessible on my own website.

Ps. The manuscript is finished, first rough editing is done too. I’m now in the phase of formatting before sending it to proof-readers and eventually to get it physically printed… I would’ve never guessed how hard it is to format?!?!?!

I have the same plan for all future books that I want to create too.

For example, I’ve set up my digital bookshop for gut-related writing here on Substack, where you can instantly download the first title “When Will You Get A Real Job” - an artist case study about the first couple of years as an independent artist.

I am working on the sequel “Mother artist” behind the scenes as well. It started out as a paywalled column on here, but I realised the format wasn’t right for the story as it has had to simmer and be written at a slower pace.

That said…

I’m really proud of the entries I did so far (and will work on finalising it this year). If it’s a topic interests you, you are warmly invited to come check out the ten first entries:

1. Maybe we have to go through a shit-show to fully bloom into who we are meant to be?

2. What I wish I knew before I became a mother

3. I rather be successful behind the scenes than forced to keep up a fake facade

4. Two major themes emerged after the pregnancy announcement; Both equally uncomfortable

5. Sticking to your principles as the noise gets louder

6. The real reason I quit instagram (despite 200k followers)

7. When the end of a chapter is the beginning of something greater

8. I am rich on sleep I never got

9. On writing with children

10. Self sabotage as a socially accepted norm for mothers

Thank you so much for coming along! Love having you ❤️

→ Now, tell me, do you recognise the feeling of experiencing an internal death in times of a massive life change?

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Hi! New Here?

I’m Elin, mother, artist and writer with a soon decade long experience of financially living off my creativity. It’s been a whirlwind of highs and lows, but what has remained constant is my faith in intuition to guide me through the noise. Society and the surrounding try enough to fill our guts with fluff, so it’s up to us to dare to tune inwards before moving forward…

Come join!